sometimes i feel ugly

sometimes i'll pass a girl in the store and wish i had her legs, her arms, her smile, her hair, her etc. i'll wake up with a zit on my chin and let it ruin the rest of my day. sometimes i'll go back to my twelve year old self with a broken heart and feel vulnerable. sometimes i cry because everything i wear makes me look fat, or i have no clothes or i look hideous no matter how much mascara i cake on. sometimes i tell myself i'm worthless and that no one will ever want to be with me. sometimes i cry for no reason or for every reason. sometimes i feel like the only teenager on the planet that hasn't had a real relationship, or hasn't been kissed or held hands or been told they're loved and worth everything in the world.

but then i think about everything i do have, like an amazing family, an amazing best friend who just so happens to be a dog, a best guy friend who is me in male form, a best girl friend who is my twin when it comes to food, a best friend who happens to be my sister and the only person i think i've ever been completely myself with. i think about all the inside jokes i have with everyone i've ever been friends with, i think about how amazing it is to be a unique set of genetics, alive and breathing with no serious conditions and just two legs to carry me throughout life. i think about how awesome it is that i can walk two steps and have clean water from a faucet and food to eat and a roof over my head. i think about how insignificant the bumps and obstacles in my life are and it makes absolutely everything okay.